ああああああああああああああああああ
ああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああ

i want to use the community tab more, as of late l

i want to use the community tab more, as of late life has been so full, there's no money to spend, no inspiration, things just float by. i can't cry, its been so long, there's not been a reason to. i told myself many times it was positive to not feel anything, at the time i felt that way, i'd rather feel anything else but sadness, i hated going to bed in my messy room and feeling tears run down like my face was a broken down faucet. i am not creative, nor smart or gifted in any way.

maybe it was been so long since i enjoyed life without nicotine or money that i forgot the joy of life, no matter for how long i hug my mother, i still get scared and everything that came up to this point flashes in my head, like a boxing match going on and each punch is a different memory

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